What I’ve learned in my 31 years is life can leave you overwhelmed and stressed if you don’t have balance. I commend those people who’ve got it figured out, those multitaskers who succeed in every challenge. For the rest of us, how do we manage?!
Unfortunately, though I’ve discovered that I can only truly be successful at one thing at a time without completely falling apart, my life requires me to juggle a couple of hats.
I’m a wife, mother, daughter, sister, cousin, friend (to those I have left), I’m in ministry, I’ll be a student in the fall, and I’m pursuing my dreams. My life REQUIRES balance. But I don’t have it. I just don’t have it. So I have slashes. Mom/Minister; Student/Wife; some slashes pull me more than others.
Life requires, demands us to have balance. What I’m learning is that I need a place where I can get away from everything that needs my attention and everything I want to give attention to; a retreat, a place of solace.
I’ve found that place in the presence of God. In His presence, I am at peace knowing that if I fumble something in life, He loves me anyway. When I cry out in worship, I get the opportunity to release every issue, every burden, every amount of disappointment to Him.
The truth is I’m extremely hard on myself. In my mind I know what I want the results to be and if I don’t get certain results I feel defeated. In a world where you’re given an award for 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and even 5th place, I struggle! Mediocrity was never praised in my family. You passed the test, you got the job, you did what was expected of you, period. Shortcomings weren’t celebrated, flaws and failures weren’t addressed healthily. There was more avoidance than acceptance. As a result, I struggle with being a perfectionist. I want everything to turn out just right.
The reality is nothing or no one is perfect. So my desire for perfection will ultimately outlive me. Have you ever felt this way?
What I’ve come to realize is it’s ok to let it all fall. Because I’m not a professional juggler, somethings going to fall and that’s ok! I’m not going to have a 4.0 grade point average and that’s ok! My dinner at times will be slightly under or over seasoned and that’s ok!! I’m going to forget an important date and that’s ok!! My left eye brow will be shaded darker than my right and that’s ok!!
Whenever you feel life falling out of control take it as an indicator for a need to rest. Unless it’s suspended in the air by a string, what you throw up is going to fall down. Allow yourself to unravel before God. Let Him see all you, not just the parts you want Him to see. We’re not perfect. He knows this.
Finally, know that you are a work in progress! Let God complete the good work He started in you. You may not like how you look or feel or even where you are in life right now. Don’t resist the process. Believe it or not it’s going to be alright!